Trader Joe’s Bacon & Spinach Salad: Nailing Your Coffin Shut One Delicious Bite at a Time
I need to look at packaging more closely. This supremely delicious Trader Joe’s Bacon and Spinach Sald (which is easily the tastiest salad they make) is 880 calories with 70g of fat!
OMFG. That’s 105% of all my fat for a whole day, and 85% of my saturated fat allotment. Not to mention 2/3 of my day’s sodium. How is this possible? Of course I had to eat the whole thing before I was able to flip over the package.
Mind you, this is a 6oz. salad. It’s not even a Big Salad.
Caveat emptor, bitches!
September 5, 2008 No Comments
Rice Krispies Treat Ice Cream, More Brilliant Than Kanye
Labor Day signals the unofficial end of summer, with ice cream trucks and raspados trickling out of view. Not that a native San Franciscan would know about that. Sure it’s 80-something today, but most times our ice cream’s confined to aisle 6 at the supermarket.
This sad state of affairs calls for homemade ice cream. Not the salt-and-ice hand cranks (I did that in my childhood; verdict: slave labor) but rather the new school canister models. Apparently they make chillable attachments for KitchenAid mixers. Might as well put that thing to use!
My original foray into homemade ice cream was courtesy of W & C’s wobbly Donvier, the one with the lid that never fit right, Alton’s Brown’s vanilla base, and a healthy dose of impatience. I can confirm that if you don’t chill the base before churning it, the ice cream is gritty and icy, though still tasty. And if you eat it soft-serve out of the machine without freezing it fully, it will melt completely before the bowl’s finished.
In no uncertain terms, homemade ice cream is analogous to homemade bread, or homemade sausage, or homemade cheese: it is a completely different animal than its store-bought cousin, or even Mitchell’s. Yes, bitch! $4 worth of half and half and sugar from Safeway is 1000% better than a $16 half-gallon from even the best shop, promise.
Flavors to try: true vanilla, salted peanut and Maganda.org-inspired Rice Krispies treat. So brill!
September 5, 2008 No Comments
RE: shelterrific » Blog Archive » steal this idea: egg carton mini cupcake holder
To: HSCL
Fr: Scott
RE: shelterrific egg carton mini cupcake holder
Memo: HSCL –We’re going to need some mini cupcakes.
And eggs. We’ll need eggs, too.
##end_memo##
shelterrific » Blog Archive » steal this idea: egg carton mini cupcake holder
August 18, 2008 No Comments
Harro! Rupdate!
In honor of Spain’s shameful-and-still-unapologized-for chinky-eye fiasco, allow me to say HARRO, WASSAPPININ HOT STUFF to all our lovely readers. (I’m Chinese, it’s okay). Big ups to Rosie O’Donnell, too, for reminding us that personal ignorance +the fact it doesn’t personally offend them = A-OK. Way to go, girl.
Moving on.
Thanks to Beverly, Erin, Bill, Thomas, Marl, Robyn and Robyn’s yet-undisclosed new boyfriend for asking what’s up with Eatgeek. I know! It has been a while so allow me to fill yous in:
- HSCL is 4 months pregnant with, apparently, my child. I’ll be the judge of that.
- HSCL and I are working on some big projects outside of blogging that are taking up lots of our time. We’ll keep you posted! Aprons will be involved. But once that’s up and running, eatgeek will continue to dazzle you daily. Or weekly. Whatever.
- I’m working full-time-plus at my job job, and it’s about to heat up real soon.
- This bagel was kind of unsatisfying.
So there you have it. True? Yes. Exciting? Not so much. We’ll be back stronger and better than ever soon. In the meantime, visit Slow Food Nation. It’s trendy!
August 15, 2008 1 Comment
Birthday Meatloaf
The Eatgeek kitchen’s been full steam ahead lately. In celebration of our birthday yesterday (Cancers!), we concocted our favorite meal: the pantry raid. Basically, throw everything on the counter and see what comes up. We had ground beef, eggs, half loaf of bread, garlic, red potatoes, parsley, soy milk, about 3 lbs. of inedible leftovers… Verdict: meatloaf!
No loaf pan so we did the freeform thing. Subbed out more garlic for the 1/2 onion we somehow didn’t have. Subbed vanilla (I know, I know) soy mik for regular milk (which was okay in this application but highly unrecommended), and multigrain bread for white bread. Glazed with about 1/2 cup ketchup…baked to 160…pretty good! We sliced into it too early and it fell apart. Still tasty, though.
Peas! They tasted better than they look. Is there any vegetable out there that freezes better or is more universal than peas? I think not.
Parsley potatoes. Quartered reds simmered till tender, then tossed with butter, salt and — wait for it — parsley!
Birthdays are great excuses for raucous flights of gluttony, and we’ll do all that next week. But sometimes, birthdays are also for remining you what’s really important in life, and being with the people you love.
July 9, 2008 1 Comment
First Annual Brother-In-Law Rib Cookoff [Verdict: You’re Not Hardcore]
Without question, the highlight of this 4th of July was the first annual rib-off versus my brother-in-law, B.I.L. B.I.L has significant advantages: a smoker…deep(er) pockets…past success…two kids…a Prada shirt. Undaunted, I charged forward with my Smart&Final card, and guts. Guts, goddammit!
Four racks of baby back ribs. I did not get what I paid for. They smelled funny. (B.I.L., sorry I failed to mention this to you. And your wife.)
The rub: brown sugar, salt, chili powder, and a bunch of other shit I found in our cupboard. I think it was too much. Plus, I made about 1 1/2 cups of rub which I would later find out is enough for, oh, about 12 racks of ribs. Did I accidentally use all 1 1/2 cups on my 4 racks? Yes. Yes I did.
Getting ready to rub some ribs. (Note that I didn’t go there.)
Rubbed, rested and ready for a 12-hour nap in the fridge.
After resting in the fridge, we poured about a half cup of liquid in each pouch (white wine, worcestershire, honey, garlic) and let them braise for about 3 hours in a 250° oven. It would smell very good very fast. Just saying.
Post-bake, we reduced the braising liquid into a glaze, painted the ribs, and broiled it crispy chewy.
The ribs came out fall-off-the-bone tender, but had a funky, totally un-rib-like flavor. It wasn’t right. It was nasty, frankly. I think the combination of bad meat plus too much rub yielded something pretty inedible. They were still suprisingly popular, though. Most satisfying comment: “Damn you, Louie, and your melt-in-your-mouth texture!”
B.I.L’s Ribs
B.I.L.’s smoker is about the most beautiful piece of hardware I have ever seen. It smells like success. Jerk.
Hardwood chips soaking in water. He’s not messing around. Bastard.
The lid comes off and out of the thick, rich smoke emerges super-dark, nearly shellacked ribs. What an ass.
Look at that smoke ring!
Okay, his ribs rocked. Deep, deep smoke flavor, good salt, pork that was actually porky. B.I.L was disappointed with the toothsomeness, but I flavor beats out tenderness every time.
So in the end, they were being nice and voted it a tie. But B.I.L. won fair and square. Not bad for my first time, but I’m looking forward to my comeback come Labor Day. Retribution!
July 6, 2008 No Comments
Steak!
Summertime means steak, tomatoes and corn. To celebrate, HSCL and I invited over the newly affianced Hot For Teacher (congrats!) for a little grilled fatty goodness, maybe some plotting and scheming.
New York strips, plenty of salt and pepper, cast iron, *shiver*
A little fresh tomato salad with olive oil, salt, pepper, vinegar and parsley.
Chimichurri of parsley, oregano, garlic, salt, pepper, onion, paprika, olive oil and vinegar. Instead of chopping everything fine, we said F it and buzzed it in a blender. Tastes better this way! Like a pesto, but sour.
Fresh corn on the cob with sticky silk, roasted in a hot oven till the papery husks revealed little jewels of sweet nothings.
HSCL’s bizarre corn-eating technique.
The barbarian’s way.
July 6, 2008 No Comments
Google Zeitgeist Reveals Most Popular Recipes, People Cook Unexpected, Undelicious Things
Google Zeitgeist reveals 2007’s most searched recipes and, dude, Americans got problems:
Recipes
- master cleanse recipe
- ratatouille recipe
- lemonade diet recipe
- mojito recipe
- zucchini bread recipe
- eggplant parmesan recipe
- dog food recipe
- chicken salad recipe
- meatloaf recipe
- simple syrup recipe
I get the ratatouille, mojito, zucchini bread, eggplant parm, chicken salad, meatloaf and simple syrup. I even get the dog food, though I’m really surprised it made the top 10. But 2 of the top 3 recipe searches are for diets? That’s really disappointing on so many levels. With all we know about basic exercise, nutrition and anatomy, it seems like Americans still can’t find a balance between good eating and good health. Moreover, the belief persists that somehow putting one thing into our bodies will help get two things out. It just don’t make no muahfuggin sense!
Take it from someone who’s been there: eat less, move more. The end.
June 27, 2008 1 Comment
Free Food: Net Loss for Wallet, Net Gain for Waistline
Haay! It’s Two Free Tacos day at Jack in the Box, y’all! Bring in any gas receipt and get two sort-of-beef tacos. Great deal, right? Perhaps.
Two Jack in the Box tacos go for 99¢, or $1.08 with tax in Oakland. Our highly efficient Honda Civic gets 38 mpg. Our closest Jack in the Box is 3.1 miles away, making the round trip for “free” tacos cost us 74¢ in gas.
Net savings: 34¢. Eh.
If we drove an average American passenger car getting 22.4 mpg, the same tacos would cost us $1.27 in gas.
Net loss: 19¢.
How about walking then? Say the average Bay Area worker makes $20/hour (I know, I know…I said average, bitches!). Your closest Jack in the Box is 5 minutes away. Total round trip plus waiting for your order is — carry the one…– 15 minutes. Net lost wages: $5.00.
Net loss: $3.92. Oh hells no!
While we’re on the subject of losing, Chick-fil-A is giving away free combo meals on July 11, 2008, if you dress up like a cow. F— the iPhone, I’m there! On second thought, our closest Chick-fil-A is at Oakland International, so maybe not.
June 26, 2008 No Comments
Twitter Experiment — Please Join Us!
Happy Friday, everyone! Our apologies for less posts this week. We’re working on big things here at Eatgeek that’ll be rolling out soon.
Today we’re launching our Twitter experiment. Twitter is, of course, the microblogging site where people can easily post their spur of the moment happenings. It’s easy and fun. In our case, we want to know:
What are you eating, cooking or craving right now?
Our answers are on the left!
To post your own answers:
- Go to twitter.com
- Login as “eatgeek” with password “scrumptious”
- Post what you’re currently eating, cooking or craving. It will appear on the site right away.
Please join us in the experiment! This should be interesting.
June 20, 2008 199 Comments